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Sales Prospects and Teenagers: The Ultimate Tag Team of Chaos

Sales Prospects and your teenage kid are conspiring to make your life a living hell. I'm not being dramatic. You're being dramatic!





 

What's This Post About?


This is a story of how preparing breakfast for my teenage son turned into a blog post on how teenagers are similar to Sales prospects. Is it a stretch? Judge for yourself.


 

It's day two of school. I get up early to get my teenage boy breakfast and prepare his lunch. There are a few schools of thought(pun intended) on who should make a teenager's lunch. We have friends who believe it teaches kids responsibility and other friends who had their parents make their lunches their entire school year. They don't have any issue with responsibility. So, who knows? Anyhow, that's not the point of the story. Stop distracting me!


I get breakfast started, trying to find a new way to showcase the same options. I pride myself on being creative, and for the most part, my child is very thankful and appreciative. Now, we both know the morning routine, we both have expectations, and we SHOULD both be involved in the process for everything to go smoothly. Right? Exactly. I should know better.


Granted, his interest level is lower than mine because, though he doesn't mind school, it's not a passion, let's say. I am dealing with a teenager. So, I made him one of his new favourites, a yogurt parfait, which I stole from a friend. My kid loves these with crunchy granola bits, fresh fruit, and rich vanilla yogurt. Sometimes, I add some strawberry jam to sweeten it a bit. It's so delicious.


Anyhow, I now focus on lunch, which, for today, was easy since he barely ate lunch yesterday! Note to new parents: THIS HAPPENS ALL THE TIME! But, like Groundhog Day, I try again to make him a lunch he will eat! Time goes by; I get the lunch ready and make myself a second cup of coffee.


I look over, but he doesn't even have a spoonful of the parfait. He had an orthodontics appointment the day before, and his teeth are hurting. "OK, so what can I make you? How about a smoothie?" "Sure", he says. "What do you want in it?" "Strawberries", he says. And I fell for the trap. I took out a frozen bag with mixed fruits, not just strawberries!! Well, that went sideways quickly - he decided he wouldn't have anything for breakfast. Which I responded with, you can't go to school on an empty stomach! or something similar to what my parents used to say to me. SMH! He dug his heels in, never making eye contact because his eyes were glued to his phone. Sound familiar?


I throw my hands in the air and go to my home office. You do you. I'm out of here. Five minutes later - I hear the wrrr of the blender. I want to think I totally planned that out and walked away intentionally. Haha

 

What the hell does that have to do with a Sales prospect? Well, I identified ten similarities between Sales prospects and my teenage kid.


  1. Unpredictability: Just like teenagers, prospects are notoriously unpredictable. One minute, they seem interested; the next, they're ghosting you or changing their mind about what they want.

  2. Low Engagement: My teenager staring at his phone while I try to get his attention is like a prospect who nods along during a meeting but is clearly somewhere else mentally. They're present but need to be more engaged.

  3. Selective Listening: Teens hear only what they want, much like prospects. You say, "We have multiple options," and they hear, "I can get a discount." Both tend to focus on their priorities rather than yours. [ and there is nothing wrong with that]

  4. Resistance to Change: My child rejected the smoothie because it wasn't just strawberries. It is the same as a prospect who insists on sticking with their current provider, no matter how much better your solution might be. [probably another stronger analogy here, but you get the idea]

  5. Testing Boundaries: Prospects and teenagers test you to see how far they can push. Prospects ask for more demos, data, and meetings to see if you'll budge on price or terms.

  6. Lack of Commitment: Like teenagers who won't make eye contact or say what they want, prospects often avoid committing until they absolutely have to. They'll delay decisions and avoid making clear choices.

  7. Need for Independence: Both require independence and prefer to avoid being told what to do. A teenager wants to make their breakfast (but not really), and a prospect wants to feel in control of the buying process (even though they need your guidance).

  8. Emotional Reactions: Teenagers react emotionally to small things—like the wrong fruit in a smoothie. Prospects are no different, responding strongly to minor objections or perceived missteps in your pitch.

  9. Value Recognition: Your kid appreciates the effort you put into breakfast… when it suits them. Prospects are the same; they only recognize value when it aligns perfectly with their immediate needs or desires.

  10. Needing Space to Decide: Sometimes, walking away is the best strategy—whether it's a teenager who needs to figure out breakfast on their own or a prospect who needs space to reflect on your proposal. Both require time to come around, and respecting that space is essential.



 

What I'm saying, if I'm saying anything (name that quote), is that sometimes, the best move is to step back and let them make the decision on their own. Or, to put it more succinctly, Think like Axl Rose. Patience.


Spoiler alert: It is an inner struggle I continually try to master, both with my teenager and prospects/clients. But the teenager will grow up, and it will get better, right? Right?!?!?!?! Serenity now. Serenity now.


Observation: I have watched waaaay too many movies and TV. SMH.


 

Thanks for reading. If you like what you read, please share and spread the word. If you want to implement the strategies mentioned in this or any other blog post, reach out, and let's talk.



 

Bernard Kuhn

Sales Strategist



 

Are you tired of the same old sales talk? Me too. That's why I'm here to share what it's like to navigate the world of selling. Join me on a journey of self-discovery and lifelong learning as I confess my sales sins and share insights beyond the typical sales playbook.

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